Hi interconnected network of biological organisms interfacing with machines,
       It's been a while.
       As I sit here on the floor of this Fort Collins, Co apartment, across the street from an elementary school, opening my blog for the first time in 4 years.  I consider who I was when I wrote that last post, and who I am now.
     What Have I learned since then?
     What Have I forgotten?
     For one, I have forgotten to write every day,  perhaps forgetting much of the magic of writing at all.  Now, just a few sentences into this Blog post,that I wonder how many people will actually read, I feel it. At the edges of my perception, like feeling a door open far off in a building by noting a slight change in air pressure.  That glimmer of mystery as each letter and word comes out fresh expressing what otherwise was left hidden.  A sense of relief settles in and I'm left wondering why I haven't been writing.
     I blame motivation, but I know that to be a vague and blurry beast fueled by doubts, fear, self-esteem,  confidence,  self-worth, and lack of discipline. This lack of motivation often walks hand-in-hand with cautious yet impulsive Indecision, and together they skip through fields of distractions and pleasures. Letting myself fall in-tow with this gang of foolish habits I always find myself waking up the next morning asking "What am I doing?"
    Of course, all of the craziness my indecision and lack of ambition  have gotten me into have been the most life changing and value solidifying times of my life.  By not wanting anything in particular I have been able to help others achieve what they want. I have been able to find a flow and movement to life that was previously hidden to me, an order to the chaos. I have had the opportunity to see that anything is possible and to change the world is the simplest thing one ever can do, it keeping it thats hard. But Most importantly, by not wanting anything in particular for myself I have learned what I do NOT want. 
     Now, with less desires and more values than ever,  I sit on a cliffs edge of the rocky mountains, looking east, glancing north, wondering.
     "What Next?"